New Years Bellyjeans and muddled memories

Jellybeans are a great favourite with some of my family. But there are some flavours that are less than favourable. Essentially the white and black ones. So, after a family gathering, there is often a small bowl of these beans languishing uneaten and slowly growing soggy and disgusting. I would never dream of just helping myself to them, just in case the owner had a change of heart, but if I am offered them, I am happy to oblige in participating in their destruction, aka gobble them up. This week I was feeling off colour and tired, no idea why, but when I was offered the aforementioned bowl I said, quite confidently "Oh yes, I love Jack Bellyjeans." And now I am considering using that name for some strange sci-fi storyline. Jack the mage? Or Jack the villain? Jack Bellyjeans the space pirate? Oh the ideas are endless. My phonetic faux pas has sparked my imagination and as I lie in bed at night fighting sleep, I weave stories around Jack and his activities. Modern hero, historical bad guy or new world character with a wicked sense of humor and an even wickeder twinkle in his golden eyes? The world of possibilities is endless. Did my children even raise their eyebrows at my mispronounced gaff? Maybe just a little bit. 

I watched Robert Irwin on TV, pick up a chameleon on a dusty South African road and carry the critter to safety. The flood of memories came washing over me. The times we would casually pick up chameleons as children were myriad. (Myriad being interpreted as somewhere around 10,000 times) Their ability to turn one eye forward and one eye back, well, we took that for granted and never questioned how amazing it was. Africans were fearful of chameleons because they believed it could change good luck to bad or if the chameleon bit you, you could change from male to female. Or at the very least the bite will never heal and stay with you until you die. They eat butterflies and grasshoppers, or as we called them 'intothoviyan'. Stinky little brightly coloured beasts that stank to high heaven and if chameleons wanted to snack on them, then we were all for it. And of course there is the connection to witchcraft. After mating season, the female chameleon turns a dark black when they are angered. So, heaven help anyone that comes across them when they are in the angry mode. Bad luck was sure to follow you all the days of your life. The Zulus in our area thought us kids were looking for trouble by keeping them as pets. I have seen a Zulu woman or two throw an apron over their heads and run screaming from the benign little green chameleon in fear. The Tsongo people say that if a chameleon bites you that you will start laughing and not be able to stop. Yes, you will literally laugh yourself into an early grave. But looking at Robert Irwin none of those dire predictions came to mind and all I could remember was the way their little paws gripped on tightly to my fingers and the way they wobbled as they walked. Their tongues are so incredibly long and so phenomenally fast that it is almost invisible as they snag their snack. Aaah I do miss those little moments of my childhood. Europeans on the other hand believe that chameleons symbolise change, patience and adaptability. Nature survives by adapting and moving forward. Anyone who has waited for a chameleon to snack on an errant fly will know that patience is required. There was no hurrying our little lizards to speed up their meal times no matter what we did. The Bible does suggest we not eat chameleons ourselves. Leviticus 11: 29-38 lists a few things not to be consumed, which includes the humble chameleon, for which I am sure they are grateful. Oh well, I wasn't planning on eating them anyway. Too many bones and not enough meat. 

Over the Christmas period various friends have sent me videos of their holiday snaps. One such was someone going swimming, without a wetsuit, at Fish Hoek beach. The sea sand was sparkling white under a perfect sun and the sea could not have been any more blue and aquamarine if I had imagined it. There is even a gorgeous rock pool for swimming in. Pretty, gorgeous and oh so false. Even on the hottest day the temperature of the sea never rises above 19 degrees centigrade. (64 degrees fahrenheit) For some folk that might sound quite warm, but I have dipped my toes in that water and within five seconds I could no longer feel my toes. Then the chill rose up my legs and invaded my muscles so that I hobbled to the warm sand for relief. Admittedly I was raised on warmer sea temperatures, usually around 28 degrees C (77 F). for the Zululand coasts. But that was the first and last time I was tempted to swim in the Cape waters. And then there were the days when we lay on the hot  white sands and within minutes were feeling the effects of the sandblasting from the Cape winds. We ended up with mouths full of grit and sand, not ideal. My husband and I even slept out on the beach one night just to experience it and it's not something we would do again. After our overnight camping, we went to the beach pools at Sea Point Pavilion. And you could be forgiven for thinking that a fresh water pool might be warmer. Yup, marginally and certainly not warm enough for comfort. I did not go in for a dip all those years ago. Yes, I am very pampered as far as swimming option are concerned. Firstly clean changing rooms with immaculate toilets and showers and secondly warm water and no cruddy things in the water. I went swimming in Melmoth (yes, it's a town in Zululand, so you can infer that it's warmer) but the pool was on a farmer's paddock and was full of frogs and tadpoles and slithery ribbons of slime. The water was warm and reminded me of lukewarm rhino pee. Were there rhinos around? Maybe not. Horses definitely. Okay, so, Summer is for swimming. But I am not tempted by those pretty pictures from the Cape of Good Hope. Maybe Kozi Bay, but then the amount of time I would need to travel by plane, sitting in cattle class, puts me off. My memories will just have to do me for now.

Should Auld Acquaintances be forgot and Never brought to mind. I might be an old acquaintance, and I will endeavour not to forget you this coming year. May the birds of happiness fill up your bank balances and your days be an abundance of joy.